Saturday, July 28, 2007

BlogHer: taking another look

Those who visit here regularly have probably noticed that I don’t have a BlogHer button in my sidebar, or a banner stating that I’m going BlogHer ’07, or any of its cousin banners. BlogHer has been one of those “don’t tread” areas of the blog world for me. It just seemed like another sorority like some other women’s blog communities.

But something happened this morning. For some reason, that I momentarily have forgotten, I Googled BlogHer out of the blue. One of the first things I saw when the page opened was Rita Arens’ post: “Don’t Feel Bad If You’re Not In Chicago Right Now...I know the blogosphere is abuzz with who's here and who's not, and I want to pause briefly in my excitement to say IT DOESN'T MATTER.”

She really hit the nail on the head with that. I have felt that BlogHer in general has been all about who’s in and who’s not; and how loud of a cheerleader are the ones that are in. I think I hear her saying that BlogHer exists for women not the other way around.

So maybe there are other members of BlogHer who operate in a different realm. (I started to write take it less seriously but that would not convey what I mean.) Maybe I don’t have to be a social butterfly to find a place in BlogHer. Maybe the social butterflies are just more noticeable because they are who they are. Maybe there are other types who hang out at BlogHer but because they are not given to being openly expressive they are harder to see, too.

This seems to be an extension of the cultural norm that exuberant people are confident but reserve people are not. I have a lot of confidence in things I know well but I am still reserved. I am not confident about BlogHer, yet, nor about ever going to a convention; but even if I gain that confidence in either – or both – I will still be reserved. I have had to learn the hard way that when I violate my internal cues that my systems have had enough and I need to withdraw to repair that it takes a long time to recover.

Since reading Rita’s post this morning I have started reading some of the other posts on the front page (well, they aren’t on the front page now but anyway). Then I clicked over to their regular blogs to read some of those posts. Some of them are okay, and I think I might subscribe to their feeds in my reader for a trial. And maybe, just maybe, a few of them will become online friends down the road.

No comments: