Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Transition: moving from the shadows into the light


“Dare alla Luce” – to give to the light, it also means to give birth in Italian. The phrase is quoted in the film Under the Tuscan Sun (2003) and in a way it describes the process me and my blog are going through at this time.

G’s Cottage is just over three years old. It has come a long way from the off-the-cuff venting and blog tagging shenanigans of the first year. Of course three years ago I had no idea that my life was about to take a few sideways skids and crashes that would challenge my transparency aversion.

From time to time I have talked about where this blog is going, both from a focus and topic perspective and from a web home perspective. The past year though has generated a shift in my intensity level about my writing in general and my web writing specifically.

I started this blog with a twofold objective: to start writing publicly instead of just talking about some day being a writer; and to find my work and mission.

I had gone back to university and finished my degree solely to stop running away from writing and to get good at it. But when I graduated the only thing I knew surely was that I would tell people’s stories and help them tell their own stories. My blog writing so far, however, has been primarily about micro-units of my story and journaling my journey to find the second half of my life.

Lately though, I sense a change underway. In ways it’s similar to the experience I had the year I turned thirty. That year my youngest child turned one and the oldest started kindergarten. I gave away all my maternity clothes and made a deliberate choice to begin thinking and moving beyond motherhood as my sole purpose for existing. But it was something else, something inside, that shifted and I suddenly felt like I was somebody who knew something.

I have been having a similar experience as I move closer to the first anniversary of my divorce decree but in a different way like I am becoming less invisible. But it’s more than just feeling no longer invisible; this time there is a sense of no longer being okay with invisibility. And it’s not just my own invisibility that I am not okay with.

For a while now my content has been migrating to the topics and issues related to life transitions. Much of what I have written over the past year has been related to my own transition following my divorce to find and create my own life and identity as a single woman with a purpose. I would not have made it this far without my support network.

If it had not been for the faith and encouragement of my family, my blogging circle, my readers and subscribers – even when you haven’t had anything to say you’ve shown up, my NaNoWriMo Buddies who refuse to let me quit, and a handful of friends from the past who have reappeared I would be sitting in a corner eating cold soup out of a can waiting for the rest of the world to end.

So I think it is time for this blog to transition again. I think the time has come to gather up my rag-tag courage and move forward. I know with certainty that everything that has happened in my life was to create the credentials I would need to make a difference. It is on that premise that I am working to build and establish a project that has the potential to reach beyond my tiny sphere of influence and encourage others to challenge the status quo in their own sphere.

Look for things to start changing over the next weeks and months. Don’t worry though, I will not pick up and move everything (should I decide that moving is the right thing to do) without plenty of preparations and announcements.

Thanks for reading.



Melissa Donovan said...

You are such an inspiration to me. I'm so happy to see you moving from the shadows and into the light :) Yay!

Deb said...

@Melissa - Thank you so much for you support. You know there are days when I don't feel inspiring and how much work goes into moving forward despite the inner editor calling foul. My quote for the week is from a recovery group: "Don't quit five minutes before your miracle appears." Maybe that needs to go in a post soon.